Avril Lavigne in entrapment scandal

Well, just when I thought the world could not be more horrific a place, Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whitby go ahead and get married. A synopsis;

He! the pop punk rocker with the soap opera name from Sum 41, the band with overall 2 good songs out of 4 albums and a penchant for wearing board shorts (men of the world, although I don’t know if Deryck counts as a man, he looks about 12, but still. Board shorts are not OK. You look like oversized toddlers with goatees, your pasty knees look unattractive and we know you don’t even skate. Buy some regular pants).

She! The sell-out canadian wench who howled her way from the streets of Ontario and into our hearts with smash hits such as ‘Complicated’ and ‘sk8r boi’ denouncing teen starlets as vapid clones before dying her own hair platinum blonde and appearing in the front row of the Chanel show, with huge Nicole Richiesque sunglasses and sans the stupid Hot Topic get-up, alongside the same people she had spent the previous 2 years ripping on.

They! 2 annoying teenagers who managed to cash in on a trend, still harbouring the misguided notion that someone other then 13 year olds, on the cusp of discovering My Chemical Romance will find meaning in their poorly written lyrics, therefore being able to silence the all encompassing voice in their heads pointing out that while certain outlets of the media may cream their pants over their new releases, they are not musicians, so much as they are well paid corporate shills.

How romantic.