Twilight, guyz!

 

On ‘Bella Swan’s’ suitors;

Amy oh gosh. says: this chinese guy just introduced himself to bella swan

Amy oh gosh.says: he looks like voldemort when he had that snake face

Amy oh gosh. says: everyone wants to bum her appaz

Amy oh gosh. says: she just got accosted by a black guy

Amy oh gosh. says: and a white guy

Amy oh gosh.  says: like the UN up in here

On how listless everyone is;

Amy oh gosh. says: i just realised this could easily be retitled ‘CRACKHEAD; A LOVE STORY’

Amy oh gosh. says: and no-one would notice

Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: true

Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: but twilight

Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: vampires

Amy oh gosh. says: girls really want to fuck princess sparklefangs over there and they’d probably fall for joey the junkie just as hard, as long as his character was as abusive and needy.

Disturbing;

Amy oh gosh. says: this motherfucker is watching her sleep
Amy oh gosh. says: how is that romantic and not horribly creepy?!

Hitting the nail on the head;

Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: That also explains the deer
Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: which is totally random
Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: and nothing to do with VAMPIRES
Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: unless these are pussy vampires
Amy oh gosh. says: they eat deer
Amy oh gosh. says: so they are basically ‘pussy vampires’
Horseshoes and Handgrenades. says: WTF

Let us all rejoice in the fact that there are three more to come.

(I got all the hilarious GIFs on this page from here)

4 thoughts on “Twilight, guyz!

  1. It beggars belief that The Lost Boys didn’t get its proper sequel The Lost Girls in 1989 (i’m probably the only person on the planet who enjoyed Lost Boys 2 : The Tribe last year, mind) yet Twlight is gonna end up like the Saw franchise with a appalling original movie spawning at least 4 increasingly shittier sequels.

    I’m imagining it’s not particularly easy to cock up the concept of teenage vampires struggling with lust and temptation but Twlight succeeded in gaying it up on every conceivable level.

  2. Heh, the Future Mrs watched this on Saturday and was in a strop all weekend because of how shit it was. She didn’t mind the book; badly written, pretty much porn for teenage girls, but not that bad. But the film was godawful, she said.

  3. i didn’t think the books were that bad either. DANGEROUS, perhaps, but not that bad. but the movie was terrible. i hope she didn’t pay legal tender for it.

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